My living room carpet is being held hostage by eight scattered heaps of laundry which have occupied my living room since Sunday. This is what happens when everything in my life is re-prioritized because I have to learn how to manage my time according to being a caregiver to not three children, but four. Technically not four because my husband is not my child but as long as he’s (temporarily) physically disabled, I have to look after him like I would my other kids. The way I see it, I have 2 girls and 2 boys which includes a 46 year old adult son.
It’s been nearly 2 weeks since Rob’s Achilles surgery. He’s doing just fine except he’s confined to a scooter, crutches, and has to rely on me to drive him anywhere. I know he would love to be mobile but getting to stay home and work from the couch as I cook, clean, manage the household, and drive everyone around is a nice benefit. As for me, I’m dying. Send wine, chocolate, and don’t forget to say a prayer for me tonight, would you?
Most of my days have been in the car from 8 am till just after 6 pm with small pockets of time to rest – just long enough to sit down and stare at the wall or if I’m lucky, long enough to get a quick shower in. That is, if I can remember to take one.
This year we transitioned into driving to 3 schools which has been a lot of back and forth, back and forth. I’m also driving a combined 6 soccer practices a week & 3 games which includes coaching one of my daughter’s teams, 3 softball practices and 2 games, and driving my husband to his medical appointments. Then there are incidents like last night when my poor 5 year old son woke up around 2 am screaming and crying because he had an ear infection and there was nothing I could do other than offer him Ibuprofen, olive oil drops in the ear, and a warm compact until I could call the doctor this morning. Of course I sat upright holding him up so we could snuggle together – a mother’s embrace does a mighty fine job of making pain feel as tolerable as it can. Aside from our busy school/sports schedule, it’s all the other errands and mundane things that need to be done which has made me a pre-curmudgeon type of character you don’t want to be near.
I realize that there are many bigger problems to complain about in the world. In fact, I realize I am being quite selfish for even feeling overwhelmed by all of this. But to me, this feeling of drowning in my own pity is getting to me.
At the end of the day all I know is this. I love my family. Even though my husband cannot do very much right now in terms of helping me, he is not my son. He is a wonderful man who, like me, is aging every day as our bodies age with us. As soon as we get the go ahead, I am going in for surgery as well to get my shoulder repaired from a torn labrum. Until then I will push through each day until it is my turn to lie on the couch with my arm in a sling and let others take care of me. You know I’m going to milk that day when it comes, milk it to the bank.
There is a season for everything. Even if it means our living room has now been converted into a messy laundry room life is good.
Feeling thankful for the friends who have offered to help, have helped, and never even bat an eye at our crazy situation. Instead, they not only offer me friendship they are a continuous well of grace which I draw from daily.
Thank you to everyone for all your emails, FB MSGS, and encouragement. I’m so encouraged by you!
For now, here is a recipe from PBS Parents I posted recently for a roasted chicken breast recipe which features beautiful lemon thyme sauce my kids love and request. We pour the sauce of pasta and it is a wonderful and satisfying meal.
- fresh thyme leaves
- lemon zest
- kosher salt
- ground pepper
- boneless chicken breast halves
- olive oil
- garlic cloves, minced
- chicken stock
- corn starch
- unsweetened apple sauce,
- chicken flavored bouillon cubes
- fresh squeezed lemon juice
- spaghetti pasta cooked al dente and according to the package directions
- fresh thyme sprigs as garnish