Etsy – Roasted Tomato Feta Scones
Spring is here and I have blooming daffodils I planted two years ago on my porch to prove it. However, I’m struggling with the fact it’s April and feeling quite confused as to what happened to January, February, and March. The only conclusion I’m willing to concede is that grief is not a respecter of time or months on a calendar. In fact, I’m learning grief has a supernatural way of tricking my mind into believing we must still be in February because so much time has passed since the start of the new year. At the very least I should have more to show for it here on Savory Sweet Life. But I don’t.
As many of you know my dad died in a pedestrian – auto accident a few days after Christmas. He was crossing a street and a speeding car hit him. The trauma to his brain could not keep him alive more than a few hours after the accident. Just long enough for my family to drive to the hospital and allow the one part shock, one part denial, and one part reality of the moment sink in. I left the hospital that evening hugging and kissing him for the last time. We buried him New Year’s Eve.
Tasty Kitchen – Rocky Road Krispie Treats
My mom moved in immediately after his death and the first couple months I would spend each day, all day, helping her close their business and moving her belongings to my home. March was the first month all of us started to adjust back to our typical schedules. However, the number of posts I would publish each week dropped significantly. In fact, it’s still not as regular as I would like it to be but with so much happening here right now I’m just trying to do the best I can given the circumstances.
I know it may seem as though I’m being a little hard on myself but I can’t help it. Then it happened. I had a light bulb moment when I realized I had been producing consistent content, just not here on Savory Sweet Life. I needed to be reminded that the reality is, I’ve been working really hard producing great content for Etsy, Tasty Kitchen, PBS Parents, and Savory Sweet Life. A part of me rejoiced when I could hear myself saying, “Yes, I’m not a slacker”!
PBS Parents – Strawberry Spinach Bacon Feta Salad
If what I’m saying seems trivial, it is. But if I learned anything from my father it is this. Sometimes you have to encourage yourself because no one else will.
PBS Parents – Quick and Easy Egg Muffin Sandwiches in Under 2 Minutes
Lastly, I want to point out all these beautiful photos (and video) I shot of recipes I’ve published elsewhere. I hope these new posts make up for the lack of them the last few months. Feel free to click on each picture to be directed to the recipe. And if you want to say something nice to me below, I won’t stop you. Your encouragement has been a source of strength from me. Thank you so much.
Alice, I just found your blog today and decided to read it all.
I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost my father unexpectedly in February. I had just moved back to NC and was looking forward to spending more time with him. Dad died of a massive stroke while in ICU recovering from bypass surgery. Since he was still intubated because he was sedated to help with the pain, he was able to be kept alive long enough for my brother to come from Louisiana. Dad had wanted to donate his organs since his brother received a heart transplant and lived another 10 years. Although the circumstances of Dad’s death were heartbreaking, he was able to donate his organs like he wanted. The stroke was so massive that it would have been immediately fatal if he hadn’t already been intubated in the ICU.
We’re thankful that he didn’t have the stroke while he was driving or outside by himself–he trained dogs for law enforcement, customs and the military. I’m glad that my father is in a better place and isn’t suffering anymore. I just miss him so much.
I have a lot of support from people that love me. My husband is wonderful. So is my mom, mother in law, stepmom and friends. My friend arranged for us to go to Myrtle Beach with my mom and aunt for Easter. It was good to get away for a bit.
Helping other people get through this keeps my mind focused on something other than my own grief. My MIL gave me a wonderful book that has also helped. Beyond the Valley by Dave Brannon, who lost his teenage daughter. Mr. Brannon writes for the devotional Our Daily Bread. His book has helped me tremendously.
I will be keeping you in my prayers. If you need someone to talk to, email me. I’ll listen. Everyone grieves differently. I think it’s good that you have projects to keep your mind off your broken heart. It is ok to take some time for yourself and grieve as you need to. I’ve discovered that I sometimes cry at the weirdest times and can’t always predict what will make me cry. I just go with it and try to put my focus on other things.
I’m taking up the violin again after a 15 year hiatus. My friend plays, and she let me play hers when I visited her the other day. She was amazed at how easily I picked it back up, so she’s helping me pick a violin to rent until I find one that I want to purchase. My father loved the violin, and I’m hoping to surprise my stepmom by playing Amazing Grace and Ashokan Farewell, from The Civil War soundtrack, two of my father’s favorites at a small gathering to spread his ashes at the end of the month.
I wish you the best. Take care of yourself while you’re taking care of those around you. Grief is stressful, and you won’t be able to care for everyone else when you’re not in a good place. (((Alice)))
Alice,
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss!! You sure have been through a lot, so I hope you don’t beat yourself up during this grieving process. I’m amazed you’ve been able to put up content anywhere at all during this time. It sounds like you’ve been swamped with just getting through the day to day stuff not to mention major upheaval/change as well.
Keep on keeping on….take some time just for you….and your readers, we’ll still be here!! 🙂
I am new to your blog…came across you this morning via pioneer woman. I do want to say how sorry I am to read about the tragedy of losing your father. I don’t know you a bit, but reading that has brought on the water works! Maybe it is the loss of my grandmother last summer and the potential loss of my grandfather any time (he is currently battling heart failure, kidney failure, and a number of other problems) while I am across the ocean. Maybe it is leftover hormones from pgcy, and bf-ing. Or maybe it’s just because I’m a sensitive old soul and hurt right along with others in their grief. Whatever the reason, this post touched me and I hope time heals!
I just found your website today and I have to say how excited I am to go home try some of your recipes! I will definitely be passing your site on to my friends. Thanks, and I assure you that I’ll be a frequent visitor to your site from now on 🙂